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29Apr/103

Boy (Cub) Scouts Create Video Game Pin, World Gets Dumber

crafted by: Alex

From the title, some of you already be thinking "Shut up! Video games can promote things like hand eye coordination, and BLAH BLAH BLAH"  Some of you might not even read this far and already be commenting on how I'm stupid. (actually I just wish people who weren't spam bots would comment on this blog, even if it were to call me stupid.)  Well, if you were to do this you would fall right in with everyone else in the world that I just realized is really dumb.  Today I was browsing CNN.com and came across a story that the Cub Scouts, which is part of the Boy Scouts Associations, added a video game belt loop / pin to their collection of goodies that kids can earn.  That seems a little odd, yes.  Oh, someone right at the start of the comments posted a link to the requirements for the badge from the official site.  Let's see what they are:

I killed 100 goombas for this thing!

Belt Loop

Complete these three requirements:

  1. Explain why it is important to have a rating system for video games. Check your video games to be sure they are right for your age.
  2. With an adult, create a schedule for you to do things that includes your chores, homework, and video gaming. Do your best to follow this schedule.
  3. Learn to play a new video game that is approved by your parent, guardian, or teacher.

Oh, wow, that seems like a very responsible way for kids to learn that videogames should be played in moderation, that only appropriate games should be played, and that schedules are very important.  Schedules are especially important because even college students and full time employees have a difficult time balancing their personal life with their school work.  To get a pin, cub scouts need to teach others how to play games, compare prices of the same game at many places, do a comparative analysis of two consoles to decide which would be more preferable, and other life lessons.

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17Feb/101

“The Tester” Makes Me Embarrassed to Play Games

crafted by: Alex

"The Tester" is Sony's new direct to Playstation Network reality television(?) series about a group of idiots gamers idiots  competing for a job as a Sony quality assurance game tester.  That's right, competing for a near minimum wage job considered to be the worst in the industry.  A funny premise, but a preview for the series was recently put up on the Playstation Network, and I couldn't help but cringe and consider giving up gaming forever for fear of being lumped in with these socially awkward and depressing people.

The preview is essentially some highlights from the audition tapes.  The people in these tapes do nothing but help the argument that video games were created by the Devil as a tool to ensure our destruction.  I have been excited that games have come to a point that can be looked at critically,  evoke emotions, and the general population accepts that they are at least a form of entertainment similar to that of movies and TV.  But unfortunately there is shit like this that comes around and makes all of us that enjoy video game look like we come from that same pile of shit.  Some of the people literally say things like "I play video games all day while collecting unemployment checks."  Really?  How about you get a fucking job?  I write this blog for fun.  But I know Paul has written 1 or 2 gaming articles for a site not worth naming for $100 a pop, it's not much but it's something, why not do that?  Are you people so terrible that you submit yourself to total defeat except when someone gives you a chance to "win" a shit job?  How about you just apply for a testing position?  You probably would have got the job without question because all they require is a high school diploma.

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16Feb/100

Lightning Lewis – Occupation: Monster Slayer / R&B Singer

crafted by: Alex

Brought to you by the NBA

Final Fantasy XIII is the most interesting Final Fantasy since FFIX.  But I have no idea what Square-Enix was thinking when they chose Leona Lewis' song "My Hands" as the Theme Song for FFXIII.  I can only imagine the brainstorming session.  "How do we make a slow paced RPG seem even less exciting, and distance our core and target audience at the same time while trying to appeal to people that will never play our game?  Leona Lewis!"  Now I know everyone has their own taste in music but if you watch the FFXIII International trailer you will will see that the song is distracting and just doesn't fit well with motorcycle Bahumut pinball or whatever is going on.

What really concerns me though is the blatant advertisement.  In the international trailer text pops up identifying the song as if it were a music video on MTV Hits There is a recently released clip of Leona Lewis "playing" Final Fantasy XIII which shows her with faces of confusion and wonderment as her brain attempt to make sense of the game.  Than she gives some bullshit monologue about how she is surprised how her song fits perfectly with the game.  Guess what Ms. Lewis... it actually doesn't.

Even crazier is that Final Fantasy XIII is the sponsor of the NBA All Star Celebrity Game.  What demographic are the going for, middle age women and Basket Ball fans?  If you go to the official Final Fantasy XIII site you will even see links for Leona Lewis and the NBA, it makes the website feel like a cheap sellout.  This makes me fear that they might attempt to actual start putting some of this non-sense more directly into the game.  Please stop this non-sense Square-Enix, please...

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