Genesis-A-Day: Animaniacs
crafted by: AlexUpon finding a magic lamp, Alex rubs out a genie. Obviously, Alex wishes for a ton of genesis games. In this feature, Alex documents the results of that wish.
More of this!
Time played: 5 minutes.
People/animals kissed: 4.
I felt bad taking this game because Paul must be playing it soon on SNES since he takes his games in alphabetical order, but i really wanted to play this. I forgot how it played form back in the day, but after about 2 seconds I remembered that this is actually a fun game. Remember Three Vikings? Each one had a unique ability, and you solved puzzles by using the right ability it the right time. It plays out like a puzzle game rather than an action platformer.
One has a hammer, one has a ping pong paddle, and one blows kisses. For some reason the hammer lights fuses to bombs and cannons? That took me a long time to figure out. It's a funny game (T-Rex with robot legs running by for no reason? Yes please.) It's not perfect, the controls are a little finicky, but I really enjoyed this game. I want to go back and see all the levels which have a movie set theme to all of them which gives it variety, yet an interesting play on the scenery.
Come Pokéwalk With Me… At PAX East 2010
crafted by: Pokémon Trainer Kev
Prof. Rowan: "Quick! What smells like pizza farts at all times?! PAX East 2010!!!"
OK so PAX East was a total bust! What the fuck, guys? What could’ve been a showcase of imported gaming goods and exclusive merchandise, ended up being a very bad Museum of Science exhibit. That’s a New England joke for ya! Alex said it best. It was for the “gaming community” and that’s pretty much why it was so goddamn lame… and smelly.
I love Magic the Gathering. I’m a complete weirdo for still playing, and loving, Pokémon at my age. But nothing compares to the pure nerd blood flowing in my veins when it comes to slinging cardboard in a damp basement with fellow Planeswalkers. For the life of me I couldn’t find any exclusive pre release cards for the new Rise of the Eldrazi set coming out. I saw an awesome photo booth featuring an excellent looking Eldrazi statue, but no cards. The illustrations booth was neat but nothing stood out. Fail.
TBB Leaves PAX Dissappointed and Smelly
crafted by: AlexHere at TBB, we give you only the honest to smelly video game nerd truth. PAX East was the first video game game convention I've been to, and unfortunately I left disappointed. The expo is geared toward the gaming community, not towards the announcement and showcase of new games. The expo area lacked lots of big name developers. The EA booth was only displaying Dante's Inferno. Seriously? I can just play the demo in the comfort of my home where nerds aren't farting everywhere and you can't tell if you smell sorta good pizza or stinky pizza farts.
On the upside, Paul and I got to play Steel Battalion in a 5 vs 5 match which was really very fun. But it says a lot when my favorite PAX experience was with a game that is 8 years old...
Uhhg, we all feel sick now, just check out these pictures, more pictures on the way soon from Paul's Camera.
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- Just arriving at PAX East
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- Behemoth Booth was pretty cool
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- Annoying guy telling paul how to play Resonance of Fate
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- Paul playing Steel Battalion
TBB at pax!
crafted by: AlexYour favorite TBB editors are at pax. Currently Paul and Alex are waiting to play Steel Battalion while Kevin bitches about how bad it smells in here. We can't wait to play. Pictures will cone soonish if I can figure out how to post them from my phone.
Otherwise there is nothing too exciting here, except the smell of pizza and BO mixing.
Genesis-A-Day: Lakers versus Celtics and the NBA Playoffs
crafted by: AlexUpon finding a magic lamp, Alex rubs out a genie. Obviously, Alex wishes for a ton of genesis games. In this feature, Alex documents the results of that wish.
Nothing I type will make this any more funny.
Time Played: 5 minutes
Fouls: 10
I laughed when I saw the title for this game. It seemed silly to limit itself to two teams, though the game does contain 8 teams. So I did some research. From Wikipedia:
Lakers versus Celtics and the NBA Playoffs was a video game released first in 1989 for MS-DOS-compatible PCs and later adapted for consoles when released in early 1991 for the Sega Mega Drive/Sega Genesis. The game was highly successful; it was the first game endorsed by the NBA and was the first to contain multiple NBA stars and teams in one game. As the title suggested, the game was launched due to the success of the 1980s Lakers–Celtics rivalry. Established stars you can play in the game are Larry Bird, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Magic Johnson, Michael Jordan, and Patrick Ewing.
Okay, that makes much for sense. It also explains why this game plays like utter horse shit. It would probably play better if you had to type commands at a DOS prompt than with a controller. I thought I had picked to play as the Celtics to play as the king of (white) basketball players, Larry Bird. Apparently I must have picked the Lakers. It wasn't until the Celtics scored did I realize I was on the Lakers. There's NO indication of what clump of pixels you are controlling.
I hit a shot from downtown putting myself in a 3-2 lead before promptly letting the Celtics get 10 more points while I fouled them because I had no idea what was going on. I think I might have to play some NBA Jam next time to redeem my non-existant appreciation of retro basketball games.
COME ON REF! NO WAY!
Genesis-A-Day: High Seas Havoc
crafted by: AlexUpon finding a magic lamp, Alex rubs out a genie. Obviously, Alex wishes for a ton of genesis games. In this feature, Alex documents the results of that wish.
I have to admit, this is actually pretty funny
Time Played: 7 minutes
Beers drank while playing this game: 1
This is a Sonic clone... a slow one. The first level looks just like Green Hill Zone. Right from the beginning I tested the controls. A = jump. B = jump. C = jump. Okay, that's easy. Press the button twice and he does a small kick in the air. The controls felt good. So I started running, and he accelerated slowly just like sonic, and I saw a hill, and a part of me was excited to move with some speed. I reached the steep downward slope AND.... nothing. He didn't run any faster. He slowly jogged down the hill. They even have death pits at the bottom of hills just like in the new Sonic games. Maybe the new games looked at High Seas Havoc for inspiration.
The only reason this seems to be called High Seas Havoc is the retard with a bandanna that is the main character, the second level takes place on a ship, and all the levels have crappy water effect at the bottom of the screen, even when you are in a city level that has nothing to do with High Seas, or even Havoc for that matter. This game sucks, I hate it. What a waste of good controls.
Drunk Gaming Takes You Into the Weekend
crafted by: Brendan
"Yeah, I know some people are against drunk driving, and I call them the cops." -Dave Attell
TBB doesn't advocate drunk driving (unless the parking meter's running out, because c'mon officer I don't want a TICKET) but we do advocate drunk gaming so to make sure everyone gets what they want I'm recommending Mario Kart 64 this weekend. It's just about the perfect game to play drunk because it's simple, competitive, and everybody has at least one friend who owns it. Needing only the gas, the item button and the joystick to play anyone can join in even if they don't regularly play video games. Despite it's simple design, the strategy of the game runs deep. Using a lightning bolt at the right time or placing bananas in the right spot to send an a driver in the drink to break your opponents heart (especially if they're playing as Toad) is as satisfying as it gets. Mario Kart makes a great party game as a number of drinking game rules can be applied; finish a beer before you finish the race being my favorite. So if you're planning on getting tipsy this weekend pop Mario Kart into the 64 and let the good times (red shells) roll.
PS - I'll destroy anyone with Bowser. It'll happen, whether you fight it or not, so I kind of want you to fight it.
The Tester Ep.1 Impressions
crafted by: AlexI downloaded the first episode of the tester. It's nice that I can download it free in HD and watch at my leisure. I still feel somewhat embarrassed watching this show, about half of the cast is socially awkward. The bonus is that these people are pretty diverse, and not just the "Real World" kind of diverse with various sexual orientations and races, but rather their personalities are actually different. I'm shocked at how all these people say it's their dream to be a tester... let me go find a testing position online and see what the requirements are.
From Activision's website for a Quality Assurance Testing Position:
Unfortunately, you won't see this on The Tester
QUALIFICATIONS (required):
Lightning Lewis – Occupation: Monster Slayer / R&B Singer
crafted by: Alex
Brought to you by the NBA
Final Fantasy XIII is the most interesting Final Fantasy since FFIX. But I have no idea what Square-Enix was thinking when they chose Leona Lewis' song "My Hands" as the Theme Song for FFXIII. I can only imagine the brainstorming session. "How do we make a slow paced RPG seem even less exciting, and distance our core and target audience at the same time while trying to appeal to people that will never play our game? Leona Lewis!" Now I know everyone has their own taste in music but if you watch the FFXIII International trailer you will will see that the song is distracting and just doesn't fit well with motorcycle Bahumut pinball or whatever is going on.
What really concerns me though is the blatant advertisement. In the international trailer text pops up identifying the song as if it were a music video on MTV Hits There is a recently released clip of Leona Lewis "playing" Final Fantasy XIII which shows her with faces of confusion and wonderment as her brain attempt to make sense of the game. Than she gives some bullshit monologue about how she is surprised how her song fits perfectly with the game. Guess what Ms. Lewis... it actually doesn't.
Even crazier is that Final Fantasy XIII is the sponsor of the NBA All Star Celebrity Game. What demographic are the going for, middle age women and Basket Ball fans? If you go to the official Final Fantasy XIII site you will even see links for Leona Lewis and the NBA, it makes the website feel like a cheap sellout. This makes me fear that they might attempt to actual start putting some of this non-sense more directly into the game. Please stop this non-sense Square-Enix, please...
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